There’s a tattoo of your name across my soul

When I talked to the Ex a few days ago, we discussed our shared sense of disorientation. He said something along the lines of feeling like the earth was spinning so fast beneath our feet and we’re just not able to keep up. Everything is changing and so swiftly too, yet we’re moving at a snail’s pace. That’s exactly how I feel. We all have our coping mechanisms, our ways of responding and adapting to the world around us. My latest one involved getting a tattoo.

The only way I can begin to rationalize this act now is by saying it was my way of showing up the racing Earth beneath my feet by shouting, “Hey! I can not only keep up with you, I can outdo you!” It was absolutely crazy. It was not even a spur of the moment kind of thing. This was something I had almost a full 24 hours to ruminate over. This was thought-out craziness. Yet, still I cast aside all doubts and sense of reason and just went for it.

I don’t regret it. I can totally see why anyone else would think I am “clinically insane.” For me, though, it made sense. In a twisted sort of way, it still does. It was a crazy, somehow delayed-impulsive, and totally uncalled for act. Still, I think I would do it again.

Sometimes, we need to throw reason to the wind and act on our impulses. This is especially true if one spends most of the time in the land of reason and logic. There has to be a happy medium, a sense of balance. Finding that balance, in my case, involved going from one extreme to the other. Now that I have got that out of my system, maybe life will start to normalize.

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Tags: Life